As family practitioners are aware, divorce cases trigger extreme emotional responses. These emotional responses are exacerbated when one of the parties has a moderate to severe personality disorder. In such cases an otherwise “simple” divorce is turned into a difficult and long affair that may draw out over several years. It would be to your benefit to understand the personality disorder involved. It will help you to manage your case more effectively to know the predilections of your difficult clients.

In almost all cases, mediation will not be successful because the two parties can agree only on continuing their chronic conflict. It is not unusual for lawyers to be terminated if they do not maintain these conflicts. It takes an inordinate amount of patience and psychological insight to steer these cases to a just and reasonable outcome. Some of the more common personality disorders you will encounter include the narcissistic person who will almost always consider his/her own needs above those of his/her spouse and children, the histrionic person who will try to cause “scenes” and wants to be the center of attention, the dependent personality disorder who calls you several times each day, and the obsessive compulsive person who may spend inordinate amounts of time on small, unimportant points.

Concomitant with difficult divorces are usually allegations and/or the presence of physical, sexual or substance abuse. A thorough psychological evaluation is required to test the validity of these charges. Some of these claims are valid, whereas others are nothing more than an expression of rage toward the ex-partner.