Sibling rivalry

<body topmargin=0 leftmargin=0 marginheight=0 marginwidth=0> <table cellpadding=0 cellspacing=0 border=0 height="100%"><tr> <td valign="top" width=160 BGCOLOR="#333333" TEXT="#F7F7FF" background="03cdedc2ddualp.png"> <div> <A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Dr. Wade Silverman, Ph.D"><U><B>Dr. Wade Silverman, Ph.D</B></U></A></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id8.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Contact Us"><U><B>Contact Us</B></U></A></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id147.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="FAQs"><U><B>FAQs</B></U></A></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id16.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="About Dr. Silverman"><U><B>About Dr. Silverman</B></U></A></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id146.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Great links"><U><B>Great links</B></U></A></div> <bR> <div> <A HREF="id3.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="The Mind Reader© archive"><U><B>The Mind Reader© archive</B></U></A></div> </td> <td valign="top" BGCOLOR="#FFFFFF" TEXT="#080000" background="03d64643.png"> <div> <FONT SIZE="5" COLOR="#666633" FACE="Times New Roman" ><B>Dr. Wade Silverman, Ph.D</B></FONT>    |     <FONT SIZE="2" COLOR="#0000BF" FACE="Times New Roman" ><A HREF="index.htm" TARGET="_top" TITLE="Dr. Wade Silverman, Ph.D"><U>home</U></A></FONT></div> <div>                                                   </div> <div> Sibling rivalry</div> <bR> <div> <U>By: Wade H. Silverman, Ph.D.</U></div> <div> Sibling rivalry is as old as Cain and Abel.  It manifests itself when brother and sister or sister and sister appear to be jealous of each other.  One of the forms this jealousy takes is competitiveness.  If you are a parent you will have a need to work through sibling rivalry with your children.  One of the most beneficial ways is to invoke the institution of the family.  You tell your children that their individual needs are not as important as sticking together as a family. </div> <div> While sibling rivalry is a normal part of all family relationships, it sometimes gets out of hand.  Signs of this are when two siblings end up being physically violent toward each other, are chronically disrespectful of each other, or are psychologically abusive to each other such as constant name calling.  Never put yourself in the position of judge or jury.  You are not to decide who is good or bad.  You are there to mete out consequences for negative behavior.  Also do not hold both children responsible for the act of an individual.  One of the most unjust things teachers do is to punish an entire class for the actions of one.</div> <div> Do not bear grudges with your children over their fights.  Supervising sibling rivalry is a normal and expected role of a parent.  Should these difficulties persist, consult a psychologist.  The treatment of choice for sibling rivalry is usually psychotherapy.</div> <div> <I>Dr. Wade H. Silverman is a clinical psychologist and President of Division of Psychotherapy  of the American Psychological Association.  He has a private practice of psychology for adolescents, adults, and families at 1390 S. Dixie Highway, Suite 2222, Coral Gables.  Telephone number:   (305) 669-3605.</I><FONT SIZE="2" COLOR="#000000" FACE="Calisto MT" ><I> </I></FONT></div> <bR> </td> </tr></table></body>